David: A Treatise on Pets

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The ideal pet provides entertainment and companionship to the owner when desired, and fucks off when unwanted.

Cat people want to observe a pet.

Dog people always want a pet that needs them.

All other pets are novelties.

My owner forgot to feed me and I died.

The End.

David: Age Is Killing My Concept of Time

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Things I've learned or accepted in the past five years:

(Can we still do html inside of.a Vent post? Fuck it, let's find out.)

• Lagavulin is great, but Ardbeg's Wee Beastie is the perfect amount of peat.


• Manifestation does not equal creation


• Gregory House was (is?) right. Everyone lies.


• The internet as we know it is lost, but there will be a next thing and we have got to get in there and make sure it stays decentralized from the outset.


• Video game consoles are just bad computers with exclusives. Nintendo still knows what they're doing.


• Doctor Strangelove is relevant again.


• Artistic expression is dead. Creators seek not to appease an audience, but a metric.


• Some people reach their 80s and still don't know what they're trying to achieve. Many of them hold federal office.


• Did I already mention the whiskey?

David: Metroid Dread

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If you're not playing this game, what are you even doing with your life?

It's not quite Super Metroid, but it's definitely a very close 2nd.

David: So You Think 21 Is Gonna Be a Good Year?

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Being deaf, dumb, and blind doesn't seem a bad deal these days.

David: Mashing Up With The Mandalorian

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I'm loving this series, and the different visions captured by the different directors. The genre mashups are fun, and the proficiency with which they're being handled makes me think of Quentin Tarantino.

Which made seeing "Directed by Robert Rodriguez" a fun moment after the most recent episode.