David: CNN Annoys Me

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I've been running cable news in the background here lately. I try to flip around every hour or so, usually trying to ping pong between Fox News and CNN or MSNBC.

Fox News is ridiculously one-sided. It's almost comical the lengths they'll go to ignoring facts and pushing illogical leaps.

The same is true of CNN. I'm more annoyed with them, because the facts are generally on their side (and they definitely have a side). Embellishing just weakens their position and gives the opposition a foil.

Also, whoever there thinks saying "All the President's Men" every 5 seconds is clever should know, it's not.

One of my morning rituals is to say, "Alexa, play my news". She then gives me the top NPR and AP stories. The NPR reporting is factual, concise, and fairly unemotional. The AP reporting then starts with great fanfare and over-emoted reads.

I wish more news was like NPR.

David: Presidential AF

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If you’re defending your spelling prowess, proofread the fuck out of your tweet first.

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1177539052683309056

David: I Miss the Comments Section

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Comments were a great way to call out bullshit news with facts.

Now everyone just says what they want with impunity, any criticism is divorced from the actual moment, and by the time it's heard the original act is already forgotten.

It's what's wrong with the "debates" that are televised between candidates. Everyone just says their own talking points and maybe tries to get off a zinger or two. There's no actual back and forth of merit.

Here's what I'd like to see: a debate where a candidate gives their response (or non-response) to a question and their opponent's role is to then question or agree with their assertion, BUT NOT PUSH THEIR OWN. Imagine how quickly this would stop many candidates dead...

They'll never agree to it.

David: Raising Funds

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In my 20s I had a policy regarding people selling shit for their kids’ fundraisers at work. If you’d take a flat donation, I’d give it to you. If not, I wasn’t busying any cookie dough, trash bags, or popcorn. I was happy to put some of my disposable income towards kids’ activities, but hated the idea of someone else getting a cut.

Now that I and my kids are older they have their own fundraisers popping up. The pressure to participate in these things is intense, especially in non-school affiliated activities where the fundraising is being spearheaded by another parent. If there’s an opportunity to cut a check for our share, we do so. The problem is that often these things go to a pool which is drawn from by all that participate. Am I the asshole for flatly refusing to participate in these things? Must we become detergent peddlers to fund or children’s sports?

Is it because there’s a stigma associated with asking for money as opposed to selling unneeded and overpriced commodities?

David: Sympathies for Mr. Uris

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It's not much of secret, but I'm not sure if I've ever mentioned it here:

I'm scared of clowns.

The fear is much more mild than when I was a child. It all started with a pretty horrific kindergarten-age nightmare which led to an unshakable distrust of facially applied white grease paint. in that dream, I awoke to find a film projector at the foot of the bed, throwing the moving image of two clowns picnicking under a giant oak tree on my wall. I climbed out of bed and walked closer to the wall, confused about where the projector had come from and interested in what the movie playing was.

One clown started juggling. The other did handsprings. I laughed.

That's when they both stopped and looked at me.

After a couple seconds of us staring at each other both clowns started walking towards me. Towards the "camera". Both disappeared out of frame as they approached; one to the left and one to the right.

They were gone, but the film still played. The leaves on the tree and the grass on the ground moved with a gentle breeze. A bird flew by in the sky. I walked closer until I was right in front of the wall.

I should have noticed that I wasn't casting a shadow.

White gloved hands shot from the portal on my wall; one to the left and one to the right. Each of them grabbed an arm and pulled me through. Now I was being dragged. Away from the floating window that showed my bedroom and towards the giant oak tree. It was the only visible landmark on an endless field of green grass. Soon I found myself on the picnic blanket, looking up into the tree. In the leaves of the tree was Telly Savalas in makeup as the Cheshire Cat. He smiled, but didn't speak.

The clowns both smiled at me. I nervously smiled back. One them grabbed my foot and started eating it from the toes while the other began to do the same with my hand.

It seemed an eternity before I woke up.

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I had a love / hate relationship with the IT television movie when I was a kid. I loved the story, even enjoyed the fear, but suffered the nightmares of Pennywise and his teeth.

I think I read the book after seeing the TV movie, but can't say with 100% certainty. I think I grew up a lot while reading that novel (IT was my first Stephen King book). It remains one of my favorites of his. As someone who was a bit of an outcast youth I yearned for a friend group akin to the Losers.

Over time the fear has subsided a great deal. I still feel a ping of anxiety if I see a clown in person, but nothing like the almost crippling fear of youth.

When IT Chapter 1 came out I looked forward to a newer and perhaps more faithful adaptation. I loved it, but it terrified me. Especially a scene involving a projector and a clown emerging. While a bit older, the kids are kids in a time I remember. Pennywise himself behaves like something out of a dream (he kind of is...). It's all very personal.

I haven't really been paying attention to release dates, but an ad for IT Chapter 2 just happened to catch my eye yesterday. There's a big part of me that doesn't want to go.

I'm already scared, and I haven't even seen a second of it.

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Tickets bought for Sunday night. Just realized I don't own any brown pants. Might buy some.