Nathan Tyree: Mama TRied
I spent my morning at a funeral. My cousin, Roy, died Friday. He and I were the same age and grew up together. We were close as children, but less so as adults. Roy saw himself as an outlaw and worked pretty hard to stay in different levels of trouble most of his life. We had drifted, although I remained very close with his parents (my aunt and uncle).
In the last year Roy had really grown up. It took until he was 33, but he was starting to be an adult: staying out of jail, taking care of his son, helping his parents with the bills.
Friday his dad took the day off work and they went fishing. They spent the day together, then around three Roy asked his dad to drop him off at The Eagles club (a private club/ bar where Roy was a member). He had a beer, then walked next door to the bait shop to pick up some stuff, then started the two mile walk home.
A young woman pulled over and offered him a ride. I don’t know if he realized how drunk she was. Very, was how drunk she was. It was about a mile before she went off the road and hit a tree. He died, she lived.
Anyway, the funeral was this morning.
I hadn’t cried. Even when my uncle hugged me so tight that I thought certain my ribs would snap and I felt his tears against my neck and he said over and over I love you; even then I didn’t cry. Then, after the fucking funeral was over and I was driving to work scanning the stations on the radio. I heard Merle haggard (at least I think it’s Merle Haggard) singing “Mama Tried.†That’s when I cried. I have no clue why.
I did get one tiny piece of good news today. Edifice Wrecked is going to publish a story of mine called “Notes Toward a Unified Philosophy.â€Â
I spent my morning at a funeral. My cousin, Roy, died Friday. He and I were the same age and grew up together. We were close as children, but less so as adults. Roy saw himself as an outlaw and worked pretty hard to stay in different levels of trouble most of his life. We had drifted, although I remained very close with his parents (my aunt and uncle).
In the last year Roy had really grown up. It took until he was 33, but he was starting to be an adult: staying out of jail, taking care of his son, helping his parents with the bills.
Friday his dad took the day off work and they went fishing. They spent the day together, then around three Roy asked his dad to drop him off at The Eagles club (a private club/ bar where Roy was a member). He had a beer, then walked next door to the bait shop to pick up some stuff, then started the two mile walk home.
A young woman pulled over and offered him a ride. I don’t know if he realized how drunk she was. Very, was how drunk she was. It was about a mile before she went off the road and hit a tree. He died, she lived.
Anyway, the funeral was this morning.
I hadn’t cried. Even when my uncle hugged me so tight that I thought certain my ribs would snap and I felt his tears against my neck and he said over and over I love you; even then I didn’t cry. Then, after the fucking funeral was over and I was driving to work scanning the stations on the radio. I heard Merle haggard (at least I think it’s Merle Haggard) singing “Mama Tried.†That’s when I cried. I have no clue why.
I did get one tiny piece of good news today. Edifice Wrecked is going to publish a story of mine called “Notes Toward a Unified Philosophy.â€Â
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